You've probably already heard that the hipster is dead, and that the 'yuccies' have taken over.
If you haven't, well, you're probably a little bit unsure of how to feel right now.
This new breed is defined as "the cultural offspring of yuppies and hipsters"; Young Urban Creatives who are "infected by the conviction that not only do you deserve to pursue your dreams; you should profit from them". And, somewhat predictably, the internet has lost its mind in a rush to document the early movements of this fascinating new cultural trope.
Of course, Dublin has a peculiar way of putting its own spin on these international phenomenons – so, do you fit the bill? If you find yourself saying yes to any of these 31 things, it would appear that you're coming down with a bad case of yuccieness.
1. You love the idea of The Old Spot putting your iPhones in a jar during Sunday brunch, but not the physical action of parting with your iPhone for a few hours.
"But... but... Instagram"
2. The phrase “I fucking LOVE avocados” escapes from your mouth at least once a day
3. You’re always willing to pay the extra euro for ‘Ready To Eat’ avocados in Tesco
4. You tell the server in Boojum that you know guac is extra before they even open their mouth
And you call it guac.
5. All cafés are ranked in your head based on whether they serve matcha or not
And every time you receive a substandard matcha latté you’ll lament the fact that you didn’t go to Kaph.
6. About once a week you give the server in Staple Foods a passive aggressive sigh when they remind you that it’s ‘cash only’
Like, what place doesn't have a card machine in this day and age?
7. You remember when the Shaw used to be ‘Cash Only’ – and not with any sort of nostalgic fondness
8. The word ‘totes’ is used in your vocab fauxronically
9. The word ‘hun’ is used in your vocab fauxronically
10. You use the word fauxronically
11. You’re not really a fan of karaoke but you know it’s like totally okay to book a booth in Ukiyo every now and then for karaoke parties
Fauxronically.
12. Any time you cross the Liffey you take a ‘Sure Dublin aren’t you only gorgeous?’ pic for your social
13. You shorten 'social media' to ‘social’
14. You’re of the opinion that events are way better if they take place in schoolyards, laneways, barges, block parties and basically anywhere that wasn't designed for that purpose
15. You write wistfully about how you would love ‘cans by the canal’, but a chilled €20 glass of 'vino' in Milano's at Baggot Street Bridge is the reality
Yes, you call it vino. Shame on you.
16. It’s not entirely unprobable that you’d do a four-day juice detox after a particularly heavy weekend on the sesh
17. You utter the phrase “No like I’m sooooo broke” before spending €50 a head on a casual Wednesday evening dinner in Whitefriar Grill
18. The plan is always to do a big food shop at the start of the week – yet you always end up doing small and crazily priced shops in Fresh on Camden Street on your way home from work each evening
19. You absolutely LOVE vintage clothes but have a wardrobe comprised only of H&M, Zara and one item from the Dublin Vintage Factory
20. When asked what you like to do on Sundays you reply with ‘Rollovers on South William Street’
"YOLOver, amirite?"
21. You way prefer festivals in hot countries, and will telling anyone who will listen that Primavera was "on another level"
22. But you still obviously love Irish festivals like Forbidden Fruit and Longitude because you can charge your iPhone when you get home every night.
23. “Omg I never watch television” is your mantra
Yet you'll mill through the new series of OITNB in one evening, pausing only to drop cryptic, spoiler-free reactions on to social.
24. Recycling is really important to you
But you dump all your takeaway containers straight into the black bin at the weekends because you literally couldn’t be arsed washing them.
25. Your Bobble bottle from STOCK is your fave possession.
“Plastic bottles are REALLY bad for you.”
26. You click attending to all the ‘Yoga In The Park’ events on Facebook
But never drag yourself out of bed in time to make it to them.
27. Your hangovers are made even worse by the fact that Bunsen don't deliver
You will bring this up about twenty times throughout the day, yet never haul ass to the actual restaurant.
28. A round of drinks at Harrys On The Green is never complete without a cheeky bottle of Prosecco too
Yes, you call it cheeky. Shame on you.
29. Permanent “pop-up” restaurants are your favourite kind
All the cool with none of the abandonment issues.
30. You rely almost exclusively on Dublin Bikes to get you from A to B
But you’d never dream of going over the 30-minute limit in case your card gets charged.
31. You tell everybody that you’re not a great cook
But it’s all good 'cos you just drown every meal in Sriracha sauce procured from the Asian Market on Drury Street.
So, what's the diagnosis - have you got Yuccie Fever?
