Pints, Patriotism And Priests: Why The Guinness Storehouse Is A Solid Option For A First Date

Dates are tricky, there are no two ways about that. You could come on too strong bringing them one place, or look absolutely vanilla bringing them another.

But that’s where we step in. We’re constantly on the look out for alternative date locations our beautiful city, and this week it’s none other than the mighty Guinness Storehouse.

Let’s break it down, shall we?

1. Risk Assessment

Suggesting the tourist hub to your preferred other half will show your deep-rooted patriotism, and fondness for history, culture and finally, pints. 

May not be their cup of tea if they are:

1. Not into pints;
2. Coeliac;
3. Not willing to spend 1+ hours surrounded by the overwhelming scent of hops. 

Your call.

Pre-booking your tours is required, so pick your times carefully as to not get stuck in amongst a clatter of ‘lads’ on a stag. 

2. Damage Control

You’re fairly protected from awkward moments, considering the tour guide will be doing all of the talking anyway. And you’re given a free pint upon completion of the excursion, which will definitely loosen you up a bit.

If you’re totally up shit creek without a paddle, the boozy base is situated in town, next to all the trains, busses and trams you can hope for. And if you’re really fucked, the airport isn’t that far a run.

Kinda.

But don’t forget: you’re pretty much just in a really big impressive bar. But cultured, so cultured. So, it shouldn’t make you want to run and hide too much.

3. Scene And Be Seen

Unless your mates have a particularly intense brewery fetish, we think you’re unlikely to be spotted. Natives of most countries generally leave the tourist spots to the tourists, so the chances of spotting a mate is slim to none. 

4. Going Well?

The immense scent of freshly brewed stout has officially been masked by your budding romance and wild charisma; well done, you’ve nailed it.

How about staying in the alcoholic love nest to which you’ve become accustomed and get involved in a taste test (pictured below) to truly treat the senses. 

Otherwise, get yourself to the impressive Gravity Bar, showcasing incredible views of the whole city at your feet. You’ll be high on love (sorry) at a cracking 46 metres off the ground, make sure to drop that in when you get there, your impressive knowledge of height is bound to impress.

5. Clothes

Anything you don’t mind smelling of hops. We can’t stress this enough.

6. Cost

Adult tickets are €20, but online you can get a 10% discount with the added bonus of a ‘skip the queue’ recourse, which sounds almost as good the brew. 

Almost.

There’s also the option to go with the Connoisseur Experience at a hefty €48, if you’re that way inclined. We’re sure it’s fantastic, and everything a Guinness drinker could ever dream of, if you’re willing to break a fifty for a day trip.

7. Best Outcome

Get down on one knee there and then, drunk on love and other intoxicating substances, and conveniently have a priest on the tour with you (it is Ireland) ready and willing to wed you atop the city itself.

Alternatively, drinking a great pint with someone who’s up for the craic, while getting slick views you would never have seen otherwise. Either or.

8. Worst Outcome

Getting absolutely sloshed on a cocktail of nerves and stout, and potentially ruining your date/rep/life, in that order.

Remember that there are many stairs. This is a marathon.

9. Overall Score

8/10. 

Bonus point if they consider Guinness drinking the sport of kings, but take a point away, if, at the end of it, they opt out of the free pint.

Happy wooing.

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