Dublin
Ireland is a funny one.
And by funny, we mean really bloody weird.
We've started to think about all the things our country and its people have that make it unique/strange; the things that make Ireland Ireland.
Have a gawk the 20 things abut Ireland that will never, ever change.
Bringing the nation its most cringe-worthy interviews since '62. RTÉ will never allow The Late Late to die.
By the way, 9.30pm isn't actually that late
And we're perfectly fine with that.
We're a bashful breed, but it's all part of the charm.
And discussing of rain, the brief cessation of the rain, and the rain's inevitable return. It's conversational gold.
Of course, we try not to let it dampen our spirits...
Because they know the ultimate truth: food is love.
This is an important issue that must be addressed in conversation.
We dedicate entire radio shows to it.
As a nation, we can't fucking stand our fellow Irish men and women getting ahead. So we bring them back down to Earth at every possible opportunity.
One such example of this begrudgery would have to be...
Pssh, guy's always trying to save children and shit. What a dick.
Until some countries (who shall remain unnamed) get better at geography and general accent recognition, there's no sign of this stopping anytime soon.
We're big fans of this one.
Translation: Kindly continue.
Sure, Mass attendance numbers are the lowest they've been since before St. Patrick did his whole bit with the shamrock, and you sure as shit don't go, but can you honestly tell me you'd deprive your future children of communion money?
Didn't think so.
Do you even know how much that shit costs?! Neither do we, but we're certain it's enough to give your parents a panic attack.
Because, let's face it, we're brilliant.
You'll always miss these convenient bastards when you're away.
Letting the heat out is the number one cause of family feuding in Ireland.
If it ain't Lyons or Barry's, it ain't shit.
Don't be wasting my time with your Twinings
Just give us a sporting opportunity, any at all, and we've got the excuse we need.
Which reminds us...
You haven't gave a shit about Irish football in years, but Shane Long scores one goal and suddenly you're a fucking expert.
No matter what happens, through rain or shine, victory or defeat, our little country will continue to be grand. God, we're lovely.
If you can think of anything else about Ireland that will never change, let us know in the comments.
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