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25th Mar 2019

31 Things All Real Dubliners Know To Be 100% True


Us Dubliners are a fine breed.

Acutely aware of our soundness, craic and ability to command a room – we’re also cripplingly shy and hesitant to dance ’cause we’ve two left feet and are awkward as f*ck.

However, there are a few things we know to be true above others. And they are…

1. Eye contact on the Luas is, on some level, illegal

2. A nice Dublin Bus driver is the best thing in the world

3. The Barge is compulsory on a sunny day

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4. You will always see someone you know en route home from a filthy afters

5. If you hang around on South William Street long enough, you’ll see one of the cast of Fade Street

6. Irish photocalls are the purest of them all

7. Those who walk down Grafton Street at rush hour are at their own risk

8. You can be guaranteed that once the slightest bit of sleet arrives, the city shuts down

9. Flannerys is for culchies (but we love it)

10. Coppers guarantees you the shift

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11. Going for one is never just one

12. If you don’t have any mutual friends with them on Facebook, they’re a weirdo

13. Paying more than €6.50 for a pint is not on

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14. Bunsen > Everything

15. The flower vendors are the wisest people of all

16. Keywest would play at the opening of an envelope

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17. A pint of plain is your only man

18. Moore Street deals are a thing of beauty

19. Bono’s an eejit

20. But fair play to him all the same


21. Seagulls can and will steal your lunch

22. The Point will always be called The Point

23. No, we don’t know why there are no right turns allowed in Dublin

24. Yes, it is annoying

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25. Not every Trinity student is a wanker

26. But most of them are

27. Protests = All day seshs

28. Murphys > Ginos

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29. Michael D is a saint we’re all unworthy of

30. Chicken fillet rolls from Spar in Balinteer can cure a multitude

31. And finally, AIB on Grafton Street has ATMs inside too. Save yourself from queuing, lads…

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