23 Things We Wore As Teenagers That Were Completely Absurd

The noughties was a shameful time for anyone who enjoyed looking good. And if you were an awkward teenager growing up among all this, you didn’t stand a bloody chance.

Below are the 23 most criminally offensive garments we all donned ourselves with during that woeful time, and try not to be too hard on yourself for wearing them – we all did.

We all really, actually, unfortunately, did.

1. Parachute pants with flailing tassels

A cyclist’s nightmare.

2. Chains to hang off our trousers

In other words: JEANS JEWELLERY.

And which are still, apparently, a thing.

3. Buffalo runners

With the flames, obviously. You could get cheap knock offs in the Ilac Centre, but they didn’t have the extra flames on the bottom too. Rumour has it they made you run faster.

4. These yokes

Fluffy raver boots, worn with not much else.

5. Circle belts

Which sat atop layered t-shirts and baggy cargo pants.

6. Von Dutch caps

The more colours, the better.

7. Coloured O’Neills

Whereas some people would argue that normal O’Neills warrant a solo slot on this list, we felt that the baby blues, pinks and even red kinds took the biscuit.

8. Charity wristbands

Favourites being The Red Cross, LIVESTRONG and the ones that said random buzzwords like ‘STRENGTH’ and ‘HOPE’ on them.

Worn all the way up the arm.

9. Ties over anything except shirts

Business in the front, party in the back.

10. Mohawks

Because nothing says ‘look at my bald head’ like a line of vertical hair.

11. Studded belts

With the buckle worn on the hip, obvs.

12. GAP hoodies

Before Abercrombie and Hollister were a thing, GAP held a tight grip on the Irish market for many a year.

Pastel colours for nights out, with navy and white worn for P.E., obviously.

13. Velour trackies

For both men and women alike.

Disclaimer: Sometimes had JUICY written across the arse.

14. Farmers’ caps

This confused the Irish public, as these tweed beauties were usually worn by elderly men trying to keep their scalps from burning while footing turf.

Then all of a sudden MTV calls them trendy?

What’s next, waders?!

15. Coloured sunglasses

Black lenses were just not a thing, and neither was protection from the sun, apparently.

16. Denim on denim on denim on denim etc

B*witched had this look down years before Brit & JT rocked up in full Canadian Tuxedo.

17. Shite highlights

Whether it was zebra stripes on ladies or frosted tips on lads, we all got it wrong.

And Sun-In only made matters worse.

18. Puka Shell necklaces

People would come home from holidays with suitcases full of these yokes, as they’d often break in an explosive fashion.

19. Boleros

Honestly, what the fuck was their purpose?

20. Collars on collars on collars

Making it rain with Abercrombie polos. Pop that shit, bro!

21. Ed Hardy everything

T-shirts, hats, jeans, badges, you name it – we had it.

22. These ridiculous trousers that were too big for everyone

But, to be fair, mums loved them because you were never ever going to grow out of them.

23. And finally, absolutely anything with this little guy on the front

Crafty little fucker conned the shit out of us, and all of our Confirmation money.

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