Ireland and its people are known throughout the world for having sharp tongues, sharper wit and a huge appreciation for the craic. And our business people are the very same.
For every run-of-the-mill business name we come across like Dealz and Reads, there are a hundred hilariously punny stores hoping to make it big in the crazy world of shop fronts.
Here are 19 of the good, the bad and the ugly shop, pub and parlour names that our lovely island has to offer.
19. Doggy Style Puppy Parlour
A puppy grooming parlour in Limerick city. However humorous, we’d feel a bit grim sending in our best friends to somewhere quite so… carnal.
Located in Graiguenamanagh, Co Kilkenny, this hairdresser is certainly a cut above the rest.
However, with such a name, one would wonder if you have to pay for extras: hot water, conditioner, coffee? Dig deep, pal.
17. Puffs & Tarts Bakery
Puffs & Tarts is a delicious homemade pastry shop located in the heart of Galway city, Eyre Square shopping centre. Pastry and slightly offensive ‘craic’?
16. Paddy Field Chinese Takeaway
A bicultural appreciation of an Irish location and Chinese food source. Amazing.
Located and loved in the heart of Monkstown, Co Dublin.
15. Curl Up & Dye
Curl Up & Dye is a fantastic hairdresser name, that is only let down by its sheer popularity. Must be tough at the top.
Rumour has it that every province has to have at least three Curl Up & Dyes to allow their citizens to receive passports
14. Sofa So Good
Who knew the people of Meath had a sense of humour? Ah, we’re only joking.
Sofa So Good is, you’ve guessed it, a furniture shop in Navan – and it’s one of the oldest on the list, having starting up in 1981. See, they had humour in the past too!
13. Chipsy Kings
A chip shop that is located in number 6 PARADISE PLACE, CORK.
We have died and gone to a greasy, deep-fried heaven.
12. Gimme Dat
What once was Finglas’s most-famous shop. Straight to the point with no messin’.
And with a name like that, it sounds like every day looked a little like this.
11. M.T. Pockets Pub
A brilliantly honest pub in Galway with a sister pub in Clare.
Showcasing a nod to the country’s perpetual drinking problem and over-spending tendencies, M.T. Pockets’s name makes you laugh… and then it makes you think.
10. How’s She Cuttin’? Barbers
Located in Belmullet, this hairdressers is not the most imaginative on the list – but something was brought to our attention when we thought twice about it.
Just IMAGINE the sniggers coming out of aul’ lads in the pub in Mayo when they say they’re off to get a trim in How’s She Cuttin? Warms the heart, doesn’t it.
9. Oifig an Chip
Located in the popular weekend getaway village of Kilmuckridge, County Wexford, Oifig an Chip was once the best fish and chip shop name you could ever imagine for us Fenian hooligans – though we do think that they somehow missed a trick by not calling it Oifig an Fish.
Since it’s closure, it has been renamed ‘Val’s Plaice’ – you couldn’t script it.
8. Thai Tanic
An Asian fusion Thai food takeaway in both Belfast and Lisburn. This would have certainly hit the top three, only if it wasn’t for the grim past behind it… and the reminder of how much of a selfish bitch Rose was to Jack.
7. For Cod and Ulster
A world famous chipper located in Belfast city, which is famous not only for being a carbohydrate wonderland, but for spray painting topical murals on its walls.
So far amongst the painted ranks have been George Best, Ian Paisley and – somewhat surprisingly – Gerry Adams.
6. Bonny Tiler
The capital whips out the classic Dublin humour once more with this ceramic wall and floor tiler – a hero we’ve all been holding out for.
Bonny Tiler can be found driving around Sandycove and Glenageary fixing anything from busted slates to broken hearts.
5. Lino Ritchie
A discount flooring and hardware store in Finglas with the slogan ‘We’ll Carpet Your Home As If It Was Our Own’ – deadly stuff.
Rumour has it that when they pick up the phone, they say… no. No, this joke is too obvious to make.
4. Angela’s Rashers
Well done Ballyfermot, well done.
3. Knobs & Knockers
A sink and door handle shop located pride of place on Nassau Street and also a popular photo-taking spot for down to Earth tourists who’ve had their fill of Trinity.
Note: They do t-shirts which are great stocking fillers.
2. Soon Fatt Chinese takeaway
Located on the outskirts of Bray, Soon Fatt is both the fit of laughter we all want and the guilt trip we all need.
1. Big Mickey Furniture Shop
Big Mickey is your one-stop cheap furniture shop located on the Sligo Road, Longford.
It’s universally understood that this is the best and brightest thing to come out of Longford in, ever. The name itself is guaranteed to make even the bleakest of you laugh heartily… and if you thought the name was good, then check out that logo.