Going on a night out in Dublin when you’re in your twenties is quite different to when you were a youth in college.
You’ll no longer make it into the student nights where every drink under the sun didn’t cost more than a fiver, and you’ll end up spending considerably more on overpriced cocktails and unnecessary shots that, realistically, you can’t afford.
Aaaaaand most of all, you’ll wake up with multiple regrets the following morning.
But don’t worry, you’re not the only one. To make you feel better, we’ve compiled a list of the 16 stages of what a typical night out in Dublin in your 20s might entail – can you relate?
Anyone who has ever gone on a night out in Dublin city will know that organising pre-drinks is a key part of saving money. But as much as we like to think that this stops us buying more drinks when we’re in the nightclub, realistically it definitely doesn’t.
2. Frantically calling for the taxis
Rounding up the troops into a taxi after a few too many shots of pure vodka is never easy.
3. Drunk text your ex
“Hey, you out?” Oh, the shame…
4. Freeze your arse off in a queue
You’ll eventually realise that your mother wasn’t telling you to wear your jacket for no reason, and that it would’ve come in pretty handy while standing in the queue for Coppers for over half an hour.
5. Finally get into Coppers
YES. You made it. Why you’re proud of being allowed into Coppers at 3am when you should be in bed already you’ll never know, but you are.
6. Watch your friend being escorted out
If you’ve never experienced the shame of watching one of your own mates being dragged out for being absolutely locked, it’s probably because this is usually you.
7. Buy a round of shots you can’t afford
You have €50 to your name, and rent is due tomorrow. But, hey, what’s a few drinks between mates?
8. Bump into your boss
You’re still trying to figure out what you could’ve possibly just said to them that could warrant a meeting on Monday morning.
9. Order more shots
Sure, what’s another round of Sambuca?
10. Turn into a professional dancer
Your favourite song comes on, and there’s just no stopping you. Little do you know you look more like a wet fish than Beyoncé’s back-up dancer.
11. Cheer your mates on as they get the shift
It’s like the proud moment when you watch your child go off on the first day of school.
12. Better yet – get the shift yourself!
Who cares if it’s the lad you swiped left to on Tinder.
13. Eat your weight in curry chips
The most important decision of the night is deciding whether you’ll have chips from Charlie’s or a Big Mac from McDonalds.
14. Attempt to afford a taxi home
“Lads, does anyone have any cash on them?”
15. Eventually make it home
* Several attempts to get the key in the door later *
16. Wake up and contemplate the meaning of life
At this exact moment you’ll promise yourself you’re never drinking again. So, who’s up for brunch?