Like any city, Dublin has got its quirks.
If you're making the move to Dublin sometime soon, or you've just arrived, you might find yourself a bit discombobulated by it all. Feel free to take a moment to Google the word 'discombobulated'.
Now, here are a few important tidbits you should know if you're going to live in this city.
1. Buses are a law unto themselves
Much like God, Dublin Bus moves in mysterious ways. A bus's schedule, as it appears on the screen, may or may not be adhered to at any given time. But who are we to question it?
2. If you're travelling by public transport, get yourself a Leap Card immediately
And if you're travelling by car or bike, you have our sympathy.
3. Flat hunting is a nightmare
In your past experiences seeking accommodation, have you ever found yourself genuinely offered a mattress on a floor in a one-room apartment, which you'd be sharing with three other people? We have. Oh what wonders await you...
4. Rent is feckin' expensive
Look, if you're really looking for cheap accommodation, apparently the cheapest county in the country for it is Longford. The next cheapest is Leitrim.
Yeah, we'd stick with Dublin too.
5. It's cheaper to live by the Luas Red Line
You may be thinking about living near the Luas for ease of transport to work, so you should know that you'll get the best price by Red Line. The average monthly rent by the Green Line is €1,444, while the average by the Red Line is €1,271.
That's not a joke or anything, it's just a good fact to know. We can serious too, dammit!
6. People care about which side of the river you live on for some reason
Legend has it this was once the term used for eating some time between breakfast and lunch. Now it is simply the name given to that mealtime which is reserved for the elite, those who have transcended that most common of meals, lunch.
8. Going out is feckin' expensive
Waking up the morning after like:
9. Dubliners have their own version of English
You'll need to acquaint yourself with the subtleties of Dublinese if you're gonna live here. Thankfully, there's a helpful video for that.
10. Do you know what George's Street, Aungier Street, Wexford Street, Camden Street and Richmond Street all have in common?
They're the same fucking street. Hasn't anyone else noticed this?!
11. All non-Dubliner Irish people are culchies
It's funny, most Irish people don't even realise they're a hick until they move to Big Shmoke.
12. There are plenty of great spots just outside the city to get away from it all
Another pureful helpful tidbit. If it all gets a bit too hectic, there's plenty of easy-to-reach places in the mountains and by sea just outside the city where you can relax.
13. The city's got a rich historical heritage...
... Which you will only give a shit about if it's narrated by Colin Farrell.
14. It's actually a truly gorgeous place when the sun comes out
And man, that's the best day of the year.
15. Dublin taxi drivers
There's always that moment of nervous tension when you first enter the car, where you don't know if there'll be chats or if you'll be spending a half hour journey home in awkward silence.
Test the water by posing the question, "Busy tonight?" and nine times out of ten you'll have a craic dealer on your hands.
While sometimes they're nigh impossible to understand (see 'Dubliners have their own version of English'), invariably they'll manage to squeeze their entire life story into the length of a cab journey.