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20th Dec 2016

14 Things You Discover When You Use Irish Public Transportation

seank

Irish public transportation is a hell of a thing.

Dublin Bus drivers are happy at the moment and a strike seems inevitable, but when you consider some of the problems you put up with as a passenger, you might realise that customers should be up in arms too.

Have a look at the list below and see if there’s anything you recognise…

1. The wi-fi is just a sick joke

Have a bum-numbingly long bus journey ahead of you? Don’t worry, this free wi-fi that you were told about should help you pass the time, it’s really fast too… Psych!

lies

To the bus driver

2. It’s expensive as shit

This one’s mainly levelled at trains. Basically you can’t afford to travel anywhere by train unless you’ve got a student card. WTF, Irish Rail?

poor

3. The food’s awful

Again a train issue, and one you could probably get over, if the prices weren’t ridiculous as well.

disgusted

4. Drunk passengers with cans are inevitable

Nothing makes your journey quite so awkward as when a bunch of drunk people with cans are getting rowdy and literally no one wants to look in their direction.

partay

5. Broken toilets are frequent

Because who doesn’t like spending a three-hour journey on the cusp of wetting oneself, while sitting in the miasma of toxic shit gas leaking from a defective commode?

stings-the-nostrils

6. Those little air conditioner things don’t quite point directly at you

The back of your head should be a comfortable temperature though.

air-con

“We mainly included this feature to fuck with the passengers”

7. People will sit beside you when there are loads of empty seats

Not exclusively an Irish phenomenon, just very annoying.

gosling

“Seriously?”

8. People will play music on their phone without headphones

There’s a special place in Hell reserved for these fuckers.

music-blaring

9. Loud phone conversations that everyone is forced to listen to are inevitable

That certainly was an interesting anecdote about your day at work, thanks for sharing it with all us folks who actually hate you.

volume

10. Overcrowding is a massive pain

We talked about this a few months back. Showing up half an hour early still won’t guarantee you a seat on the train sometimes. Standers will always resent those lucky seated bastards.

crowded-train

11. There’s a compulsion to thank bus drivers

They’re just so damn sound.

you-da-man

12. “Looking forward to going home next Bank Holiday Weekend?”

“Lol jk that’s when we’re gonna strike.”

kanye-laugh

13. Our public transport pales in comparison to other countries

Ours tends to have the occasional gap…

dublin-luas

14. But we have one thing they’ll never have…

“STAND CLEAR! LUGGAGE DOORS OPER-ATING!”

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