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26th Dec 2016

14 Things You’ll Recognise When You Return To Your Hometown For Christmas

seank

With so many people heading back to their hometowns for Christmas, we thought we’d take a look at some of the things we all experience when we head home after a long absence…

1. That sweet feeling of homecoming

You’re relating to Chris Rea so hard right now.

2. You get nostalgic about all the things you used to hate about the place

“Oh look, over there was where I had the worse fucking job of my life! Classic times.”

Such Fun

3. You meet the lovely old local shopkeeper again

Who seems to be eternally the same age.

Yoohoo

4. You quickly get the sense that things really haven’t changed much in general

Boring

5. You make your obligatory visits 

When all you actually wanna do is chill out at home and watch The Muppet Christmas Carol.

Awkward Hi

6. You get updated on all the local gossip

i.e. All the people who died recently (who you didn’t know anyway).

You Dont Say

7. You’re told you’ve developed notions since moving away

Better keep your choice of clothing as conservative as you can, lest anyone should think you’re a prick.

Fancy

8. Blessed be that sound priest who gives quickie Christmas Mass sermons

For he shall inherit the earth.

Ted

9. Highly anticipated reunions will take place exclusively in cramped pubs

Ah, so many familiar faces. Too many familiar faces. And their faces are far too close to my face.

Too Many People

10. “So how have you been getting on?” is the recurring question of your festive nights at home

Doing Good Baby

11. You realise that having only one place to head out is both a blessing and a curse

True, the choice anxiety has been removed, but this place is shit. It’s the emotional conflict at the heart of your Christmas nights out.

Happy Sad

12. You get cornered by someone you half-knew from school in the bathroom

Let’s talk about how we recognise each other’s faces for a bit.

Jeffwinger Leave

13. You will awkwardly meet your ex

Requiring a delicately executed exit strategy.

Jumping  Out Of  Window

14. By the end, you’ll have achieved a sense of validation in your decision to have left this town in the first place

Until next year, home!

Han Solo

Did we miss anything? Let us know in the comments.

READ NEXT: 14 People We All Have To Endure Over The Christmas Season

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