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"She Was Looking For 50 Shades Of Grey, And Yer Man Went A Solid Hundred On Her"

By aidan

December 20, 2016 at 12:10am


We asked our readers to provide their worst flatsharing stories, for a chance to win a month's rent. Check out Story #9 here – and see below for details on how to vote!

"Once upon a time three Irish girls living in Boston used Craigslist to find a fourth roommate.

"Enter [redacted], a Ukrainian scientist and avid online dater who was looking for her very own Christian Grey… enough said.

"One night as we sat in our rooms supping the pre-leaba cup of Barry’s, we began to hear loud noises. Then suddenly there was a loud crash and [redacted] ran out of the house in floods of tears, leaving us in the apartment with her amorous online buddy.

"Next came a knock on the bedroom door, and there he was BALLS naked looking for [redacted], who at this point was down the street calling the cops.

We watched from the kitchen window as this 'went down', secretly wishing that our Mam was there to have a word

"Lover boy then ran out of the house and sped off in his car. A few minutes later the cops arrive to investigate the disturbance.

"They convinced [redacted] to lure him back to the apartment with a suggestive text so they could interrogate him – which was a clever touch, in fairness.

"We watched from the kitchen window as this 'went down', secretly wishing that our Mam was there to have a word. Turns out [redacted] was looking for 50 shades of Grey and that creep went a solid hundred on her.

"As for us, we’ll stick with 40 shades of green."

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Check out the other stories

Story #1

After The Commotion, We Noticed He Was On Top Of Another Person... Who Was Also Naked'

Story #2

He Thought This Was The Most Normal Thing In The World, And Carried On Talking About The Weather

Story #3

One Time He Ate A Whole Roasted Chicken Whilst Lying In Bed With No Clothes On

Story #4

When Drunk And Not In Familiar Surroundings, I Tend To Sleepwalk

Story #5

I Turned Around, And There He Was Was Watching Us In The Dark, With A Bottle In His Hand

Story #6

To This Day He's Unaware Of How He Sleepwalked Into One Of Our Neighbour's Houses

Story #7

We Returned From The Festival To A Vast Number Of People Crying On The Street

Story #8

I Saw A Man Sitting On The Couch, Rolling A Joint, Who Looked Like A Bad Bill Bailey Impersonator

Story #9

She Was Looking For 50 Shades Of Grey, And Yer Man Went A Solid Hundred On Her

Story #10

I Grab My Girlfriend To Protect Her Modesty. He Leaves The Room Shouting OLÉ OLÉ OLÉ

Story #11

It's Not That He Was Malicious – He Was Just The Most Careless Man I've Ever Met

Story #12

Turns Out For The Past Three Months My Roomate Had Been Taking My Rent Money


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