15 Unforgivable Sins All Dublin People Know To Be True
How dare you?
Dublin, much like every other major city, has its quirks and attributes.
It has the little things that make Dublin Dublin, and things that only the inhabitants understand, like the rules of the city.
That's not to say that there's a rulebook you can consult about our beloved city, rather that there are a set of unwritten rules that we all know to abide by lest we be exiled from the city.
So whether you're a newcomer or oldie who needs to brush up on their Dublin skills, have a read through of the ultimate sins you can commit in Dublin's fair city:
1. Thou shalt not violate Molly Malone
She is our gal, our national treasure, who deserves more than drunken tourists singing around her.
People who take photos touching the breasts of the Molly Malone statue need to get in the sea rn— Eva-Jane Gaffney (@EvaJanez) July 8, 2017
2. Thou shalt not walk in the cycle lane
Unless you have nerves of steel to deal with being shouted at half seven in the morning. Respect the bikes, yo.
3. Thou shalt not desecrate our sacred canal
Cans? Love them. Big bag of the aforementioned? Love them even more.
Leaving the canal in a state after several big bags? Not cool.
4. Thou shalt not slow walk
Perhaps one of the gravest sins of all. Don't, for the love of God, go for a leisurely stroll at rush hour.
5. Thou shalt not skip the Dublin bike queue
Don't be that person.
6. Thou shalt not use the public transport to travel one stop
If you are only going one stop, get off the bus and walk t'fuck.
7. Thou shalt not feed the seagulls
Betrayal, if I ever saw it.
8. Thou shalt not buy a chicken fillet roll without availing of the meal deal
Eating a chicken fillet roll without a pack of Tayto and a can of Diet Coke? You monster.
9. Thou shalt not confuse the North and South side
Know your side, and know it well.
11. Thou shalt not speak ill of Michael D
He is an angel amongst us mere mortals.
Find someone who enjoys being with you as much as Bród likes being with Michael D Higgins pic.twitter.com/zr8cu0hhUg— ɹɐſıʌ (@jiffington) July 10, 2017
12. Thou shalt not stop for a picture on Ha'Penny Bridge
And thus making everyone stop and bump into each other.
13. Thou shalt not listen to U2
Except with a pint your hand.
14. Thou shalt not frequent Charlies in the daylight
Do they even open in the sober hours?
15. Thou shalt not scare the deers in the park
The park is their home, you mongrel. Leave them alone.