18 Things The World Would See If Oxegen Was Broadcast Like Coachella

Oxegen remains, to this day, a special time in all of our lives. A dream, almost. Maybe a nightmare for some, but it definitely helped shape the human being you are today. 

And that got us thinking, what if the world had as much of an obsession with Oxegen as it does with Coachella? 

Thankfully, they don’t. But here’s what they’d get a glimpse of if they did.

1. Irish celebs in their finery

Complete with extensions and turbans.

2. The mud Olympics

No one got out alive. 

3. Wildly false rumours shouted around the campsites unabashedly

Anything from “Cheryl Cole just died” to “yer aul one’s got worms”.

4. Wheelbarrows FILLED with Dutch Gold, cheap cider and Duty Free Vodka

Did anyone even drink anything else?

5. A plethora of granola bar wrappers

#soakage.

6. Ghouls emerging their tents at 9am each morning

Genuinely devastated to see the sun is shining.

7. A definite trail of fake tan going from the Mainstage to the Blue Campsite 

? Follow the SunShimmer road ?

8. Thousands upon thousands of terrible quality tent situations

€10 tents from Penneys, why did we trust them?

9. Banners of every calibre 

From “Dunboyne County Champs 2010” to “Are ya well? Cause you’re looking well”.

10. The rise of the Foil Survival Blanket

The tin foil snug of dreams. 

11. Toilets that make you wish you were never born

”Mum? I think it’s time to come get me”.

12. Some twit shouting “Alan?”

And another twit shouting “Steve?!”

13. Food leftovers being flung high into the air on Sunday night

Beans? Throw. Popcorn? Throw. Bread? Throw.

14. Scantily clad 15-year-olds somehow getting in

Clutching the peach schnapps they robbed from their parents’ cabinet. 

15. The lads playing fancy dress 

Why look at Rita Ora when you can check these guys out?

16. Good craic Gardaí

Who’ll remind you where you are and send you back on your merry way.

17. Tent gymnastics

Festival goers falling spectacularly via the surrounding strings of the many, many tents.

18. And finally, Amanda Brunker live

You’re so welcome.

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