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The Paddy's Day Patty – Celebrate Ireland With A Savage Green, White And Gold Burger

By niallharbison

December 20, 2016 at 12:10am


  • Burger bun
  • Chicken breast
  • Spinach
  • Avocado
  • Cheddar cheese
  • Sweet potato
  • Parsley
  • Green Tomatoes (Cucumber if you can't find them)

I wanted to do a recipe to make everybody proud of being Irish but also to explain the difference between what our national day is called in different parts of the world.

The real name is St Patrick's Day. Lots of people call it Paddy's Day, which is fine with me, but what is a massive pain in the hole is people calling it Patty's Day – there is no such person as Patty and I'm not sure how the name changed while crossing the Atlantic to this corrupted version.

Just to mess with all your heads, though, a patty is actually a word for a piece of meat or burger – so I've created a Paddy's Day patty. Confused? Me neither. Happy St Patrick's Day.


Step 1

The ingredients are all easy to find expect maybe the green tomatoes. They do have a lovely flavour but if you can't find them get a cucumber if you want to be patriotic or some red tomatoes if you don't give a shit what it looks like.


Step 2

Peel the sweet potatoes and slice them up into even sized pieces.


Step 3

Fuck the slices onto a tray and throw them into the oven with a little olive oil and some salt. About 180C / 360F for 15 minutes should do the job.


Step 4

Grab the breast out. Ideally it'll have skin on it for a little more flavour.


Step 5

Slice it a little bit to thin it out so as it cooks quicker.


Step 6

Lash it into a hot griddle pan (normal frying pan will do if you don't have one). Bit of salt and some olive oil and a nice high heat and you are laughing.


Step 7

While that is cooking slice up the tomatoes.


Step 8

Look at how green the little bastards are. Like they are from another planet or something!


Step 9

Slice up the cheese. Don't just buy any old cheddar. Try splashing out a little for a better one if you can. Will make all the difference.


Step 10

Lash a pot on for the spinach. All you need here is a little oil and to stir it for about 30 seconds and it will cook itself. Simples


Step 11

Once it wilts down whip it off the heat and thats it!


Step 12

When you've cooked the chicken for about 30 seconds on each side lash the cheese on top and throw it back into the oven to melt. Should take about a minute.


Step 13

Toast the buns in the toaster. Even the village idiot could manage this step in fairness.


Step 14

Peel the avocado and whip out the stone that is in the middle. Make sure you get a nice ripe one because there is nothing that tastes worst than those shitty ones the supermarket try to palm you off with that are not ripe. Spend a little extra for a good soft one.


Step 15

Chop the shit out of the avocado and throw in a little salt to taste.


Step 16

Chop up the parsley. This isn't going to add a ton of flavour or anything but this recipe is all about being green so the more the better!


Step 17

Lash the avocado onto the bap. This kind of acts like the sauce and the glue that brings the whole stack together.


Step 18

Throw on the spinach next and then the chicken breast straight out of the oven. Sprinkle a little of the parsley over the whole thing and then top with the sweet potatoes which should be nice and soft. Finish it by throwing the other half of the bap.


Step 19

And that is that! Pretty simple to make, very healthy and a joy to eat. Special marks if you know the Cathedral in the background of the photo. I'll give you a clue it starts with P and isn't Patty's Cathedral!!! Enjoy!


So there you go. A savage tasting burger that has all our colours in there and which is pretty good for you. People think that the day is all about boozing and getting down the pub but this is a healthy alternative. Get the ingredients and give it a lash because it tastes absolutely amazing!


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