6 Completely Valid Reasons To Ditch The Turkey This Year

Once a year, for some unknown reason, we all go to the effort of cooking a humungous bird that no-one particularly likes. I reckon it’s time to put an end to the madness – let’s all stop falling victim to turkey dinner peer pressure.

So, here are six solid excuses to ditch the turkey next week – don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise!

1. Turkeys ain’t cheap

Why do we pay up to €60 for something we’ll be trying to get rid of for days?

2. They’re as dry as Ireland on Good Friday

A mouthful of turkey is as good as a handful of sandpaper.

3. The skin is the only nice part

Like opening a beautifully wrapped present to discover coal inside.

4. You have to drench turkey in gravy for it to be even the slightest bit tasty

5. It’s a fucking trek to cook

Between 3 – 6 hours?

6. Turkey is just chicken’s lesser-liked cousin

Everybody loves chicken. Chicken for President!

So there you have it, turkey is rank and shouldn’t be anywhere near our dinner tables next week.

End of.